Seems that Morris and Anulka are a pair of bisexuals (ever notice that screen lesbians rarely look like the stereotype?) murdered by a homophobe for having indulged mutual desires. Many years later, however, they return to life as vampires and decide to combine their need for sustenance with revenge on the male sex whom had persecuted them beyond toleration in life. Posing as hookers, they take up residence in an abandoned castle to which they take a succession of sleazy would-be johns and drink their blood. They decide to be merciful toward one particular traveling salesman and drain him of only a minute quantity. Unaware that the origin of his malady lies in his visit to the regal whorehouse, upon falling ill, the guy seeks assistance from a nearby couple who live in a trailer. Upon recovery, he finds that he has a crush on one of the girls, and keeps returning for more. In time, she falls for him too, which throws a monkey wrench in their plans to systematically drain him to death. The trailer couple, with whom he maintains ties out of gratitude, catches wind that something fishy is going on and poke their noses in where some might say they don’t belong, finding that all clues lead to a couple of mysterious girls whose nearby residence has been strangely unknown. Played almost sympathetically up to this point, the vampire girls, feeling that their scheme is about to be blown, set out after a certain couple who’d have done better leaving well enough alone.
A minor programmer to round out drive-in triple bills, VAMPYRES is no classic, not by a long shot, but is entertaining for what it is. You could (and probably have) done worse. Purchase is not recommended, but discount rental is.
[Originally published in Temple of Schlock #11, September 1988]
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